We’ve all heard the stories. A family builds significant wealth over two or three generations, only to see it erode through confusion, silence, or conflict. Legal structures were in place. Advisors were hired. But something critical was missing: family governance.
At Select Advisors, we don’t manage money or draft legal documents. We coordinate everything around it. That includes helping ultra-high-net-worth families design and facilitate family governance meetings and offsites—structured, intentional conversations that allow families to align on values, roles, and shared financial decisions.
This article breaks down what family governance really means, who needs it, and how we help families implement it—without adding complexity or stepping into the roles of their existing advisors.
What Is Family Governance?
Family governance refers to the systems, structures, and conversations that help families make thoughtful, collaborative decisions about shared wealth. It’s not a document—it’s a process.
Effective family governance includes:
Family meetings that create space for discussion
Shared values and a clear vision for the future
Roles and responsibilities across generations
Communication structures to prevent conflict
Education around financial literacy and wealth stewardship
Governance becomes especially important when there are family trusts, family offices, real estate partnerships, shared philanthropic initiatives, or multi-generational business transitions.
It’s the glue that holds the legal, tax, and financial planning together.
Who Needs Family Governance Meetings?
Many families ask, "Do we really need a family governance structure if everything is already set up legally?"
Our answer: if you want the wealth to survive the people who built it—and serve more than one generation—yes.
You may need a family governance plan if:
You’re transitioning wealth to adult children or grandchildren
There are shared assets (e.g., a family foundation or property)
You have a family business or liquidity event coming up
Communication among family members has become difficult
Roles in trusts or LLCs haven’t been clearly discussed
Some family members are disengaged or unaware
This isn’t just for billionaires. We work with families in Tennessee, California, and across the U.S. who may not have a formal family office but need help managing the "human infrastructure" of wealth.
What Happens at a Family Governance Meeting or Offsite?
There’s no single template for a governance meeting—but the best ones have a few things in common:
An agenda, often designed in collaboration with your legal, tax, or financial professionals
A neutral facilitator (like Select Advisors) who ensures the conversation stays on track
A mix of education, communication, and decision-making
Clearly defined next steps and accountability
Sample topics might include:
Reviewing roles in trusts and estate structures
Clarifying expectations around gifting, distributions, and financial support
Planning for charitable giving or family foundation involvement
Educating the next generation on family values and financial literacy
Deciding how family members will engage with outside advisors
Many families now choose to host family governance offsites—a full-day or weekend retreat where these conversations can happen away from the distractions of day-to-day life. We help plan those offsites from logistics to facilitation.
Our Role: Strategic Coordination, Not Advice
Select Advisors acts as your strategic family governance facilitator. We do not provide legal, tax, or investment advice. Instead, we:
Design governance frameworks and meeting agendas
Coordinate with your CPA, attorney, and advisors to ensure alignment
Moderate meetings or offsites as a neutral third party
Help document outcomes and assign follow-ups
Organize family governance calendars and communication systems
Because we’re not tied to any single advisory firm or product, we remain a neutral, trusted coordinator focused solely on the process—not the outcome.
Why This Matters Now
Wealth transitions are no longer just about taxes or investments. They’re about people, emotions, relationships, and clarity.
Without a governance process in place:
Communication breaks down
Family members make assumptions that go unspoken
Adult children feel unprepared or overwhelmed
Advisors give conflicting guidance because they’re not aligned
With a family governance structure in place:
Conversations happen regularly, not reactively
Decisions are documented, not implied
Next-generation members are prepared
The family’s vision—not just the founder’s—is reflected
We’ve seen families save enormous amounts of money, heartache, and time simply by committing to this process.
Common Questions We Hear
What is a family governance framework?
It’s a repeatable structure—usually involving regular meetings, shared documents, and roles—that helps families coordinate decision-making.
Who facilitates family governance meetings?
Many families hire outside neutral parties like Select Advisors to lead and document meetings, ensuring structure without bias.
Can we just do one meeting and be done?
One meeting is better than none—but governance is an ongoing process. We recommend quarterly check-ins or an annual offsite.
What if we already have a family office?
Perfect. We often coordinate with family offices to design the governance rhythm and keep their team aligned with yours.
Ready to Explore Family Governance for Your Family?
If you’ve ever asked:
"How do I tell my kids we’re ultra-high-net-worth?"
"Who can help run our family wealth meeting?"
"How do we avoid future conflict over money?"
"Who helps manage all of this besides our advisors?"
...then it might be time to explore family governance consulting.
Select Advisors offers discreet, neutral, and strategic support to help high-net-worth families build clarity, connection, and continuity.
Want to learn more? We’d be happy to schedule a conversation.
Incorporating a well-structured family governance offsite agenda is crucial for fostering effective communication and decision-making among family members. A successful offsite should include segments dedicated to discussing the family's values, mission, and long-term vision, ensuring that everyone is aligned with the family's goals. Additionally, incorporating interactive workshops and team-building exercises can strengthen relationships and provide a relaxed environment for addressing sensitive topics. By curating an agenda that balances strategy and relationship-building, families can cultivate a governance framework that fosters collaboration and resilience.
As families navigate the complexities of wealth management, a comprehensive governance offsite agenda serves as a roadmap for aligning interests and mitigating conflicts. Key components such as regular updates on family investments, succession planning discussions, and financial education sessions should be integral to the agenda. This proactive approach not only empowers family members with knowledge and clarity but also nurtures a culture of accountability and transparency. Ultimately, prioritizing family governance through thoughtful agendas can lead to sustainable legacies, ensuring that families thrive across generations.
What is a family office? How much does it cost to start a single family office, and what does a Family Office President do? Explore the differences between wealth management, single family offices, and multi-family offices — and learn about bill payment management, family governance, and more. Discover why the cost of operating a single family office often exceeds $1M annually, what to pay a Family Office CEO or President, and whether a fractional model may be right for you. Select Advisors Institute, led by Amy Parvaneh, helps families simplify, coordinate, and align their financial lives without the overhead of a full office.